A Quickie On My “Imaginary” Wife – Is He or Isn’t He?

Not too long ago, I had an amusing little triple event the same week, all revolving around my marital status:

– One person had “discovered” I was married through careful analysis of my social media profiles on Twitter and Facebook and later joked about it with my wife at a work social event;

– Another was dead certain I was Single and asked me out;

– and EVERONE else who knew I was at least dating were wondering if my galpal even existed or was she imaginary;

Well, let me get this clear once and for all, though I have to break one of the rules imposed on me and state: Yes I AM Married, and happily so since 2010.

A Quote about The Secret Wife from Conan O'Brian

A Quote about The Secret Wife from Conan O’Brian

There’s never really been any kind of serious secrecy about it, but I do understand the confusion. And worse, because certain OTHER rules that are ABSOLUTE have been imposed on me, some friends might still think my wife is imaginary. So here’s the rules:

1) My wife, hereon stated as “galpal”, does NOT want to be part of my social media circle. She likes people, but hates being the outsider when everyone starts talking about this account or that SEO technique or whatever. So understandably, she is almost never around at any event and doesn’t want to be talked about or even mentioned as well. In fact, she removed her FB page to ensure her virtual privacy and has virtually never touched her Twitter… (set up by me long ago to just reserve her name at the least). Strangely enough, since she knows me to be a bit of a flirt at times, she’s totally at ease with having 2/3 of my friends and work associates to be female.

2) I am to post NO photos of her on FB or Twitter or whatever. Anyone who’s a close enough friend is allowed to see what few photos there are of her on my FB page, which all date over 2 years or more.

I already posted this one in 2007 long ago... so hopefully this doesn't break the new pics law

I already posted this one in 2007 long ago… so hopefully this doesn’t break the new pics law

As such, this blog post is breaking rule #1 right now, but I think this is for a good purpose. Seeing as I don’t wear my ring either (just hate wearing jewelry) and I literally don’t talk about her out of habit now these days, not to mention referring her as “galpal” or not at all, well, you can see why I pretty much show up on my lonesome most times.

So just making this quickie note to my really wide circle of foodies, social media pals and so on who are still wondering to clarify things.

And nope. No new pictures. If you’re a close enough friend or associate, and really want to satisfy your curiosity, friend me on Facebook. Check out my pics in 2010.

Just to let you know, to break that rule is literally a fatalistic action. After all, she knows the exact lethal food allergies I have. Knowing she can take me out anytime… well…